10.09.2007

not nice!

veiled post-it threat???
I ambled into the break room today for some water and saw this lovely little PostIt left by one of the security guards on a Pepsi machine. I'm of two minds about this: a) I totally want to make fun of it (hence the blog post) b) I wish Dude had contacted me as this particular vending machine has stolen at least $1.00 from me over the year. I could hold the vending machine re-stocking guy while he retrieved our collective $1.75. Rest assured, I no longer use this vending machine for my subsidized caffeine.

What is particularly striking about the note, at least to me, is the threat of it.... "I'm with security up front." Okay okay, this isn't as threatening as say, "I'm with security." Period. Direct and to the point, there's no messing around. Or how about, "I'm with security and plan on chasing your ass down on my Segway. Then I'll beat you over the head with my company issued bike helmet until I get my $0.75 back." Cause, you know, specifics can be scary.

Perhaps I could recruit this fellow for my Black Ops mission to destroy the household Christmas lights I saw up. But then again, he wears high-water pants. In the security world of Segways and "safe for another day" comments (not kidding with that one), high-water pants indicate newbies. The longer your tenure in the security world the closer the pant cuffs get the the ground. It is, after all, something to work towards in a world where the uniform is the same for all security guards.

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant water break.

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